“Hot in Bethlehem”— Brizer’s official TC notes on Eagles, circa 2012…

Like the trouper he is, our beloved GateKeeper Emeritus Brizer traveled to Lehigh University on Friday and filed his observations… And as he told us, he would comment on specific targets of concentration, and not necessarily on the entire experience…

GK Brizer represented at Eagles TC on Friday in his traditional “State of The Eagles Union” garb… Somehow he stayed cool under the collar despite 94 degrees F. temperature…

As Brizer drove into the university parking lot on Friday, little did he know he’d be walking into another firestorm of injuries and personal angst… 

Eagles wide receiver DeSean Jackson tangled with two defenders in a 7-on-7 drill this afternoon and came down awkwardly on his left ankle. He had it taped and watched the rest of the way. The team does not believe it to be serious.

The Eagles also operated completely without rookie defensive tackle Fletcher Cox, who was excused from practice for personal reasons and left the campus to deal with them.

Also dealing with injuries are S O.J. Atogwe (groin), LB Jamar Chaney (hamstring). TE Brent Celek (groin), OL Brandon Washington (concussion), S Nate Allen (hamstring) , and DE Jason Babin (calf)…

What Brizer observed with a military general’s strategic detachment before he commented:

Running back Chris Polk (rookie free agent) broke through the middle of the starting defense and broke two tackles during a 50-yard run in a scrimmage.

Quarterback Trent Edwards (free agent) hit wide receiver Damaris Jackson (rookie free agent) in stride for a touchdown against cornerback Wade Bonner (rookie free agent) during one-on-one drills.

Today’s Position analysis: Linebacker: Returning players: Brian Rolle (starter), Jamar Chaney, Keenan Clayton, Akeem Jordan, Casey Matthews… Newcomers: DeMeco Ryans (starter, trade), Mychal Kendricks (starter, draft pick), Ryan Rau (free agent), Monte Simmons (free agent)…The Eagles are so deep at linebacker that they traded Moise Fokou and Greg Lloyd to Indianapolis on Thursday. This position, regarded among the weakest on the team last season, received a major upgrade when they acquired Ryans in a trade with Houston. His leadership and stability in the middle will ease the pressure on players such as Kendricks, Rolle, Chaney and Matthews. Kendricks, a second-round pick, is the starting strongside linebacker. Chaney and Rolle are fighting for the weakside starting job.

Play of the day…Running back Dion Lewis dazzled the fans and earned a standing ovation by converting a short screen pass into an 80-yard touchdown. He juked several defenders, then easily outran defensive end Brandon Graham to the end zone.

What they’re saying…Cornerback Kevin Thomas, who was acquired in a trade from Indianapolis for linebackers Fokou and Lloyd: “I was just told that (the Colts) really needed some linebackers. I was surprised because my play in Indy has been really good.”

Okay, against that backdrop of Brizer’s arrival at Lehigh, here is the official EEB transcript of Brizer’s report:

-Julian barfing was pretty funny.
Our 4 backs look pretty frickin’ good,…esp Dion!!!
Dunlap has issues,…he makes this team,..out of desperation. Looked very uncomfortable ,.leg problems,.and over all conditioning,..kinda pathetic,.poor suker.
Dion looks like a smaller and quicker Jacksonville back,..Drew!
@beanstalk no arse!!..need an arse when yur 6’9″..no leverage…
Chad Hall makes this team. His problem: undisciplined jukes…
Avant,.catches everything…amazing everyone there. Perfect tuff slot WR….
Biggest surprises,..damaris and trent,….EDWARDS!!!
Maffews,..the GFBWLJB99’s boy,..is still getting pushed around….
Yea,..#10 burnt DRC like a piece of toast ,..for a TD!!!..keepin’ it real. Enuff of this DRC glorification!!!!
@PPW not getting the leverage part of LB…
Best short to medium passer,..Edwards…based on accuracy and timing..
Vick ,..still making mistakes…
-@beanstalk Kafker,.ok ,..for a few games.
This Damaris chap,..makes this team. He’s got return expertise,….his gait,.similar to #10..which is a good thing,.just not as fast. You can tell ,.Dion not interested in the return game. Which is a good thing..because,.hesuks there!!!
@Dr Funt— Vick short arming throws,.and not thinking. Dumped a pass,..didn’t realize he was in the endzone….SAFETY!!!!!!…perk up…
Fireman limped off the practice field….as 60% of the wussie players!!!!
elce threw out the F bomb,..because players were mucking up!!!……Penalties on boff sides of the line…off sides,..and false starts galore,..why?…I don’t know…
My simplistic and too premature rejaculation,…not a SB team,…yet. Lotta talent..Coaches will have to outperform their contracts to get the desired results……GK.
-@beanstalk mefinks,..from my limited exposure,.it’s mc Nutt vs Riley…
Polk looked tough to bring down,..which is a good thing. He can play in the NFL…
-Welp,..off to Cannery Row,.for a beer milk shake. Nite ladies.

And off Brizer rode to lead the Charge of the Light Brigade into the Valley of… er, Delaware…  Thank you, GK, for those original and pithy observations of Eagles TC 2012 edition…

Here’s some late “bonus” takes from Bri ….
-LUPES,..yur proofing had an error…VICK was short arming long passes,..and had the SAFETY,..not FOLES!!!…perk up!
HaHaHa,..some of my esteemed colleagues need to perk up and realize the inferred caveat,…my Bird’s EYEview,.was merely a snapshot,..a point in time,..of the state of our team,.from what I observed. Any gross extrapolation into da future,.is folly,.and is sumptin’ that recalcitrants would do. In hindsight,…we should murderlize Kenny. BC should be flogged,.tarred,.and Bird feathered! Whoswiffme?……………….GK.
Mr. Beam,..let me makes this perfectly clear,…the McNutt vs Riley,…realistically is the first elimination. followed by the vs CBs armamentum,..then the FA WR,.if necessary competition. Are we understanding the situation,..sir?-
@Kenemeka YW,..TBT,..when I saw Edwards connecting on many shorties,..I thought of you and yur dink and dunk view of him. But,..he did surprise me wiff highly accurate passes of the medium variety and even a few longer ones. Bottomline: He aint dead yet,..but should cut his hair.
I was standing most of the time,..floating and scribing. Also,.in the endzone later,..for some RZ work. Andy got peturbed a cupla times. The snap was not there. Most players,..looked to be doggin’ it a bit. But,.not Chad Hall!!!!..bundle of energy and looks stronger. His jukes are great,.until he jukes back into coverage at times….Kinda funny to see it happen,..alot.
Bell takes plays off,.and is pretty good at holding.

Thomas Jackson

About Thomas Jackson

Jax Sports Media has been reporting on NFL teams in the mid-Atlantic region since 2006. Thomas Jackson is its senior writer. Tom started covering the Philadelphia Eagles for the MVN Network in 2007. In 2009 he joined the Bloguin Network. He now also covers the Baltimore Ravens.